Words

I dabble with words in this space, twisting them around observations in a variety of voices.  This, as all things, is a work in progress.

I don't want to show you this photo.

It's technically inaccurate, I didn't spend enough time taking it, I wanted to do an entirely different composition, and, well, it makes me feel naked.  I'm showing you more than I want you, or anyone else really, to see.

I'm highlighting my patch of gray hair, the bags under my eyes and those tiny hairs on my chin.  I'm exhibiting my stress,  my sleeplessness.  I'm showing this moment's intense struggle.  This is me, today.  This is not hindsight; it is not an "it gets better" photo. There is no before or after; this is now.

Tomorrow may be better, and then in a week or so I will probably be back to an easier place.  Right now, though, I'm wrestling the gators.  To embrace authenticity is to lay this moment bare.  To accept it as a part of living a full, incredible life.  To understand that even now, even in this dark place, there is beauty.